To Hollywood and the media, it’s more acceptable for a politician to cheat on their spouses and “sext” random women with their young children present, than it is to actually have a healthy, respectful marriage. Take the left’s treatment of Vice President Mike Pence, whose comments made in 2002 about boundaries in his marriage have come back this week to haunt him.
After a Washington Post article included a comment Pence made 15 years ago about refusing to have lunch or dinner dates alone with women other than his wife, many on the left threw a fit at the “outrageous” and outdated rule. A Mother Jones editor even compared Pence’s personal decision for his own marriage akin to “Sharia law,” while The Huffington Post eagerly attacked Pence as sexist, claiming that “In Pence’s worldview, men have no self-control, and women are either temptresses or guardians of virtue.”
Late Show host Stephen Colbert also went after Pence on his show Thursday night, in a long-winded, scathing segment full of crass sex jokes and cheap shots. Which is rich, coming from the network whose own former late-night sleaze host, David Letterman, made headlines for sleeping with interns.
COLBERT: But let’s take a break from Trump just a moment– can we take a break from Trump, please? Can we do that? ( Cheers and applause ) And let’s talk about someone who has no power in Washington, Mike Pence. ( Laughter )
Colbert went on to claim that the reason Pence has this rule in his marriage, must be because he is a horny, out of control sex maniac, who gets aroused by inanimate objects by just looking at alcohol.
“The Washington Post just did a profile of Mike and Mrs. Mike, and they have evidently, a pretty solid thing going on. Because Pence never eats alone with a woman other than his wife. That can mean only one thing: Mike Pence is such an out-of-control force five bone-icane, that he has to be monitored by Karen Pence at all times. One Amstel Light and he’s dry-humping the bread basket. Okay? ( Laughter ) Oh, there’s snow on the roof but there’s a fire in the furnace,” (Applause)
“Pence also won’t attend events featuring alcohol without his wife by his side. He’s so naughty, if you left him alone with a bottle of whiskey, he might try to have sex with it. And Jim Beam and Jack Daniels are both dudes. And he is “not” into scene! He has to pray away the Mt. Gay. That’s what I hear. I don’t know.”
If that wasn’t bad enough, Colbert goes on to mock the Pence’s engagement story.
“Then there’s the story of how the Pence’s got engaged. While they were out feeding ducks in 1985, this is a true story, Mike Pence hollowed out two loaves of bread, placing a bottle of champagne in one and the ring box in the other for her to discover as she tore off pieces. Which is pretty impressive. It means Karen can tell the difference between Mike Pence and a loaf of bread. It’s actually a very cute engagement story. ( Laughter) It’s actually a very cute engagement story and it’s a good thing Karen was there because you do not want to leave Mike Pence alone with one of those seductive loaves of bread.”
“Yeah. The yeast isn’t the only thing that’s rising. ( Laughter ) Also, it’s worth noting that the couple later got the bread shellacked. Of course, shellacked bread is an Indiana delicacy.”